Having recently been diagnosed with breast cancer, I find myself reflecting on my choice to forgo regular mammograms. Would regular mammogram have resulted in earlier detection? Perhaps—but I also recognize that cancer isn’t always detected in routine screenings.
I deeply appreciate the modern diagnostic tools, yet I am in awe of the immense intelligence inherent in the body, something each one of us has. Sometimes it feels like the body is a treasure chest and I am quite unaware of what is contained within. Access to the diagnostic tools is limited and happens periodically, but the intelligence in the body is available to us every day and every moment.
If my ability to listen to my body was more refined, would I have asked for a mammogram sooner? How powerful it would be to refine our innate ability to listen to the body and sense its quiet messages before it must shout for attention. What if understanding the body’s signals is simpler than we can imagine?
I am asking life—life force, my body, call it what you will —to guide me. To teach me how to listen deeply to the body, and receive its messages, especially the uncomfortable ones I’ve struggled to understand. My body is not my enemy; it is my ally on this lifetime’s journey.
Yet, I wonder – How did I arrive at this moment, facing a life-threatening autoimmune condition where my own immune system is unable to defend against invaders, even turning against the healthy cells? Could my relationship with the outer world be reflected in my body, my inner world?
I recall the saying: “As within, so without; as without, so within.” I can’t help wondering, what would it feel like to truly heal my relationship with life and the world? I tend to this mystery grateful for this breath, this body and the present moment.
In a bizarre way, I can also accept the cancer diagnosis as a wake up call, inspiring these deeper contemplations.